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passionWhen it comes to dating and relationships, we need passion to keep things alive and moving forward. Without the passion, the relationship becomes stale and stagnant and eventually dies. The same can be said about people in general. If we aren’t pushing ourselves to be the best we can be, we become content with life and give up trying and in reality, we stop living.

But as great as passion is, having too much passion can destroy a relationship. If one person cares too much about something, it can get to a point where it interferes with the relationship.

A Failed Relationship Because of Too Much Passion

I dated a girl once for a few months. I met her on Plenty of Fish and we had a connection from the start. That connection carried through to meeting in person as well. But after a few dates, it became apparent that she was too passionate for me, and I would venture most people.

Her passion was with rescue animals. When someone would no longer want a cat, or dog, or other pet, they typically bring them to a shelter. The shelter cannot handle all of these animals, so they find foster homes for them.

A foster home is a person that volunteers to take in a pet and care for it until someone comes along that wants to adopt the pet. Understand that I think this is a great thing. But you have to draw the line.

The girl I was dating was so passionate about helping rescue animals that it interfered with our relationship. On the weekends, we had to stay local so she could run home every 2 hours and check on the animals and feed them/take them out to go the bathroom.

Then there was the constant running back and forth the shelter to get more animals and take the ones that were adopted. Again, I think that volunteering in this way is a great thing, but she was more passionate about helping the animals than she was about forming a relationship with me.

Maybe this was because she wasn’t that interested in me or some other issue. The point is, no one, whether you are a man or a woman, wants to play second fiddle to something else when it comes to a relationship.

Realize that there are times, many times in a relationship when other commitments interfere. It is part of life. But it becomes a problem when those commitments never end or are always more important than the other person.

Don’t Give Up Your Passion

Don’t mistake this post as telling you that you can’t be passionate about anything other than your spouse. That is not what I am saying whatsoever. What I am saying is that you need to take your spouse’s needs into account if you want the relationship to work. You can still have passions in life outside of your relationship (and you should in fact), you just need to make sure that the passion doesn’t destroy your relationship because it is more important than the person you are with.

dating tips for introvertsDating can be a rough enough experience for those who have no qualms about meeting new people and being in new situations. However, introverts generally find dating a very difficult experience and for good reason.

Introverts are naturally shy people who avoid situations of confrontation or embarrassment. This is why it is so difficult for an introvert to approach a man or woman at the bar and strike up a conversation. Since this is how many find dates, it should come as no surprise then that most introverts don’t date all that often.

Dating Tips For Introverts

So what can you do as an introvert to get out into the dating scene and date? Below you will find a handful of dating tips for introverts to help you out. Many of these I have tried and used for great success. After all, I am an introvert myself.

Observe & Gather Information: The most obvious, yet the most misunderstood method for getting out on the dating scene is observing the actions of others. I did this a lot before I was married.

I would just observe how people interact. Their body language, facial expressions, etc. In time, I became good at knowing when a guy was coming on too strong and how the women showed that she wasn’t interested. When it came to going on dates, I applied this information and was more comfortable dating because of it.

Look for Things in Common: For the most part, people meet though the hobbies and topics that they have in common. This can be a wonderful way to warm up to a date by attending conferences or events where you are surrounded by those who share your interest.

In other words, if you want to date and find potential people to date, do the things you love to do! Of course, if you love to watch movies on your couch you are going to find it hard to find someone. Jump online and find out where people that enjoy the same hobbies spend their time and then join in!

Mutual Friends: One of the most common ways people meet is through mutual friends. In fact, many mutual friends have helped couples meet through common events such as bringing them along to a party or dinner which leads to a no-pressure conversation. A mutual friend can be a great source of meeting new people for introverts.

Therefore, make it a point to tell your friends that you are looking to be set up. There is no harm or shame in doing this. They know you best and have a good idea of people that would be perfect for you.

Online Dating: Growing by leaps and bounds, online dating has many advantages that start with the fact that you have the barrier of distance and a computer screen to start building up a relationship before you meet face to face.

This is how I met my wife, but don’t think that online dating is a guarantee. You still need to put in the effort if you want to meet others online. Plus, you need to find the right site(s) to join. Luckily, I saved you time with that by creating my online dating comparison chart.

Be Reactive, Not Proactive: There is something to be said about the strong, silent type or the quiet, shy type that many people find attractive. This is because you are a mystery to them and they want to find out what you are all about rather than open your mouth and let everyone know the truth. Basically, don’t try to prove anything or show off, just be yourself and react to those around you.

While you may (and probably do) put too much pressure on yourself, do your best to just be you and not worry about what others are thinking or doing. Many times, when we make a mistake, it is only us that notices.

Final Thoughts

Following these dating tips for introverts will help you start your journey to finding people to date and will make the dating process that much smoother. Be sure to also read up on my dating tips for shy guys as well has how to date a shy guy.

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